Exactly. They’re kids. They act like kids. No need to put it online for scrutiny. Feel very sorry for the birthday child because their reaction is completely normal for their age.
I remember being at my cousin's kid's birthday party and you could see the spit strings flying out of his mouth all over the cake. I looked up in horror and disgust at my other cousin and she gave me this "Don't you say a fucking word" look. I didn't say anything, but I'm also not touching that fucking cake.
This is why when I make birthday cakes for my friends and put candles on them (because you can tear forcing people to blow out a candle out of my cold, dead hands), I actually make a batch of cupcakes and stick a candle in one cupcake. Ain't no one gonna be eating a spit cake out of my kitchen!
I thought after Covid we were done with this horrible tradition. Last bday party we had the person pull a single candle and blow it out away from the cake.
This is my life now. My sister has two toddlers. they blow out everyone’s candles, spit all over the cake, and yet still have tantrums that everything isn’t about them. Lord help me
Your sister is a bad parent. My mom has 6 kids and I’m the oldest at 20 youngest is 3. We’ve never had that issue. It’s so rude. Little kids only think everything is about them when they’re made to believe that. It ain’t right.
You have a typo. It should be ‘My sister and I let her two toddlers blow out everyone’s candles’. You’re the adults.. teach the Kids how to act right. If they cry let them. You’re enabling poor behavior
We like to do cupcake "cakes" which is PERFECT because you can 1. Pull the birthday person's desired cupcake and light up **just** that cupcake and 2. You can easily distribute cupcakes to all of the party goers with minimal mess and fuss.
People could still also just cut the birthday person a slice and pop the candle on there and save everyone else the act of partaking in cake and germs.
My sister always had to buy the little guy a little present when it was his sisters birthday. What do you think she got when it was his birthday? Squat. Because she don’t whine.
In my experience the child would get angrier and detroy the cake.
Once the emotion damn has broken they are inconsolable.
Heck the same shit happens to teenagers who know better and the emotion damn still clouds every facet of their brain from critical thinking.
When i was 8 or 9 i got 2 beyblades, 1 for me and 1 as a present for my best friends birthday party.
Well my mom wrapped the wrong one and when he opened it i started crying and freaking out saying it was mine.
In the back of my head i knew it didn't matter and i still had the other one at home...but no i ruined that party. I screamed and cried until they finally gave it to me and then i locked myself in the bathroom and played with it.
Then i couldn't bring myself to leave the bathroom in shame so i yelled that i needed my mom.
Edit. It was a planned sleepover and she had to drive over.
She had to get me out of the bathroom, and clayton never talked to me again. I cringe everytime i think about it and wish i could time travel.
Icing on the cake, i ran into him at college orientation(so what 11 years later) and as he was leaving he said "oops i wouldn't want to accidentally take your pen" and dropped it on the table and left....gutted
I was probably still like that until 11 or 12 haha.
Tbh it was probably learned distain, as i went to a private christian school my parents could barely afford and they were 10 years younger than the rest of the parents of my friends. I had to leave in 6th grade because my parents couldn't afford it and i never got to hang out with any of my freinds again until highschool when a couple left and their parents talked to my parents about how everyone was stuck up and they destained my family for not belonging.
So you take that scenario, and his parents talking about the trailer trash that left, i can see him not being excited to see me like i was to see him.
Nah bruh fuck Clayton, he should've let it go by now. If you feel bad about your behavior, that shows emotional maturity. But hey, you were 8. We all have bad days. It's all good 👍 But if a dude in his early 20's wants to act all petty about something that happened at his 8th birthday party he needs to grow tf up lol
I responded to someone else, but his parents were with the crowd that ignored and cut contact with my parents after we couldnt afford to keep going to the private school.
So it was probably learned distain on top of an easy jab from the past.
The kids who left for public school came back into my life and the parents lemented on how shitty the clique environment was.
I swear to God a parent will make the tiniest miscalculation and then some random group of Redditors claw their way back out of Hell itself just so they can take all that vitriol and throw it at some people that literally just mildly inconvenienced their child.
Putting the little sister down next to the cake is a miscalculation, sure. The delay in doing something is a little shitty, but the damage was already done. But they deserve to be shit on for posting this online. It does nothing but show a difficult moment for someone who very likely did not consent to it being posted. People need to calm down on displaying every moment of their kids lives (especially the hard ones) online. My cousin does this and I'm so embarrassed for her kids.
I don’t think anybody needs to call CPS or anything, but this is also not a great thing to allow to happen.
Parents tend to laugh this sort of thing off as a younger child annoying their older sibling in an ultimately harmless way. But the older girl here is probably picking up on how the adults let her sister take something she was looking forward to, and remembering how much trouble she’s gotten in whenever she did the same thing to her sister. My younger brother and I had the same dynamic, and the message I internalized as a young kid was that other people were allowed to have nice things, but my rules were that I had to sit there politely while other people took my nice things from me.
That’s why the girl yells at the end - she’s not pissed that she didn’t get to blow out candles, she’s pissed because something was taken from her unfairly and the people who were supposed to fix unfair situations wouldn’t take it seriously.
nah bro, look at all that stuff. my parent (only had mother) never gave a shit about my birthday, just a horrible day as any other day in my childhood. thats poor parenting.
Yeah. Assuming this is her sister, I’m sure it feels like her whole life is centered around the younger sister. She can’t have one day where things get to be about her?
And then the parents act really surprised when they can't get along at all in their teens.
Then when she confronts them as to why they'll go "WE GAVE YOU EVERYTHING", get mad and punish her some more.
It's sad but really prevalent.
Can you get out of my head, please? Fuck. I'm grown up now, and I love my parents, but I've heard "you had a great childhood, we put a roof over your head and fed you" so many god damn times. I appreciate that you did the bare minimum to keep me alive, mom. But you never listened to my wants or needs ever growing up, and now you can't figure out why I don't call or visit more often.
They think it be cute for pictures and for memories. But it's not cute, and the only one walking away with memories of this day will be the birthday girl.
Adults have no idea how special birthdays are to such young children. I could imagine myself in her situation at that age and I'd be absolutely miserable.
My parents ignored my 13 birthday and didn't get me a cake, and I was very upset I didn't get my birthday wish for my first teen year. We went to a restaurant with a 3 hour wait time instead because that's where my grandparents wanted to go. When I came home and started crying I didn't get my happy birthday wish, they got really pissy with me. Flash forward a few years, and I forgot Mother's Day because it was right smack in the middle of college finals. My mom threw a fit about it and continued to bring it up for 2 years. I finally said "if you stop bringing it up all the time, I'll stop telling people how the whole family ignored my 13 birthday because you wanted to go to Outback Steakhouse." She stared at me for a moment and then agreed. Birthdays are really important to kids and especially girls. It's not about you.
To be fair, at my oldest last birthday I asked if her younger sister could help blow out the candles. She loves to include her sister so excitedly said yes. I won’t assume every year is a yes but she was happy to share.
That's completely fine, in my opinion. You asked and got their buy in. It's when the adults in the crowd don't try to prevent the kid's special day from being hijacked that it makes me sad for the kid.
The same reason they then took the video of it happening and uploaded it to the Internet. Their experience of the event is more important than that of the children... and the little kid stealing the show is a more interesting outcome for the parent.. if everything went smoothly what sort of story would the parent have to tell, after all?
When you live your life thinking you're the protagonist, sometimes you stop caring about the npcs.
That's not how birthday wish magic works, look at this guy thinking you can just make more wishes... pffft, next you'll be saying you wished for more wishes...
Tbf, mom did tell Georgia “we’ll do it again” when she grabbed little sis. And bless Georgia, she tried so hard to be a good sport, but sadness overcame her.
I thought that. I was like er this is your doing..
I had to share my birthday with my younger sister. Same day 3 years apart. But I would have been exactly like the birthday girl if someone else had blown out the candles. It's like the parents knew that it would happen and hope that she would be OK with it. Like let the girl have one day to celebrate her. I bet she has to share everything with her sibling.
I feel for the birthday girl. That's her cake and her moment. Plus she is 7. How are we meant to think she should have adult emotions at this moment?
Do people not realize that the emotions kids feel are real and justified? They're dealing with life for the first time. Shit like this sticks to your memories. Let her have her day as i'm sure the other little monster gets to personally destroy it's own cake on it's day. Parents suck.
Seriously. My youngest sibling (7 years between us) was born prematurely on my birthday by totally random chance. My parents understood that sharing the day could present problems, especially since my sibling was so much younger, and they always went out of their way to ensure we both celebrated our days in ways that gave us both full attention and total individuality.
One year, my aunt was in charge of the cake situation, and she bought just one birthday cake (that had a really babyish design geared more for my sibling) for both of us to share. My mom freaked out since she specified there had to be two and didn’t want me to have to just shut up and accept having a “baby” cake, and she went out to get another cake for me so we’d both have our own.
I still remember that stuff, and while it was maybe silly or a waste or a small thing or something, it always showed me that my parents respected me and gave me absolute equal attention to my siblings and didn’t let the baby of the family take over a day that was already mine just for simplicity’s sake. Now that we’re adults we just share, but it mattered a lot as a kid.
Your mom rocks. I dated a dude in high school whose birthday was a day after Christmas. They always worked hard to make sure he still got a special day instead of it just being lumped in with holiday festivities, and I always thought that was really special.
very similar situation here, me and my brother are twins and when we were younger(9) we lived in a homeless shelter. he’s a big fan of chocolate but i’ve never liked it and the staff knew so on our birthday they suprised us with a spider-man cake that was half vanilla and half chocolate. the part that stuck with me the most was not them surprising us with cake but they cared enough to include both our opinions
I wish I had your parents, my mom and step father never really gave a fuck about me, they got married on my birthday and now always celebrate their failing marriage before even beginning to give the first of fucks about my birthday or that I even existed, I’m just glad that my biological sister gets better treatment yet I wish she didn’t have to suffer from their selfishness and ignorance
what a great mum. making sure both of your birthdays were important and separate until y'all were old enough to decide to share. what's the difference between buying two cakes on two different days out of the year, vs buying two cakes for one day? must have felt really good to have your mum understand you unconditionally like that.
I was born on my sisters’ sixth birthday. They are twins. There were always three of us sharing the day. Until I was about 9, Mom made sure, even when we were at our poorest, each of us had a cake to ourselves. We may have shared the actual party, but we all had our own cake for us and our friends. (The twins couldn’t be more unalike and had different friends.)
What kind of parent doesn't know their kid like this? My son will absolutely blow anybody's candles away. He's autistic. He is standing by the entire time
My oldest 2 are autistic. We have always had birthday kid out their own candles, and then we relight for siblings or birthday kid again. One is obsessed and constantly blows out my scented candles.
LOL Reminds me when I wasn't aware of my autistic nephew's love for blowing candles, and he is faster than the speed of light. Imagine my surprise when he suddenly took off across the room to blow out all the prayer candles at church while yelling out, "CAAAAANDLEEEE!!!!" before I could get to him 😬 and he is mainly nonverbal, but he really said candle loud and clear. I felt really guilty about what happened but also happy to have heard him talk 😅
I’m sorry, when you said “standing by the entire time” I just had a vision of your son with an earpiece, sunglasses, and a suit, waiting for intel that the candles were about to be lit and his time to blow them out has come 😂
Sometimes I'm surprised how adults don't realize that all kids have three traits in common they are dumb, impulsive and selfish if you put them next to anything they want they will take it they don't care cause they don't have the self control of an adult.
You know why it’s a big deal when kids do nice things? Because it’s an unnatural behaviour.
Kids first instinct is to be selfish, so it takes a lot of time to teach them to be selfless and giving.
You gotta assume the worst all the time, because if you don’t you won’t be prepared for if it happens. I haven’t even met this kid, and I could tell just by his face how this was gonna end. No way the parents couldn’t.
So many people's piss poor excuses to relieve themselves when things don't go the right way, and it could have been prevented.
I'd say the best remedy for this is to go up to your kid and connect with them and say, "I'm sorry, your sister blew your candles out, and that hurt your feelings." Then offer a couple solutions. "Do you want to do it again" "do you want to help cut the cake and get the first piece"
I bet the tears are gone, and they feel connected to you.
And don't leave the younger one out of a learning opportunity. Teach them that we don't bow out other people's candles. It's not a nice thing to do.
Many family's would just gaslight that child and tell them to quit crying. Really think about it though, how would you feel if that special moment was taken from you? You would be a little hurt. As an adult, you can probably control your emotions better, but kids can't, so they lose it over things like this.
Be better parents, and have a faster reaction time. They all just watched that shit happen and now look where we are.
The best of remedies is prevention. The adults were more concerned with the “picture moment” than remembering that the baby will obviously blow out any candle in front of them.
I don’t know that baby and could see this happening a mile away.
Exactly.
I say a comment that said "I bet the parents thought it would be cute to have them next to each other."
Okay and..... who cares. Parents be ruining all type of things for their kids all because they (the parents) think it's a good idea.
Edit: I found the comment
"Kinda harsh...
Parents prolly thought it could have been wholesome moment for two siblings to share and to have memories of. You acting like the parents beat the kid on her birthday 💀"
@doedoe21doe
In my circle, we sit the birthday person down and do the song and candles while the horde of toddlers and candle-blowers are held back and told to allow the person their special day and a solo picture. *Then* we release the horde and take pictures. (Toddlers birthdays get a small cake/cupcake to blow on because who wants toddler spit on their cake? The blowing of 1 person is quite enough, thanks).
Everybody gets a piece of the action and the pictures they want, nobody’s feelings get hurt.
You can imagine how my posse feels about face-cake smashers…
🤬 I can not stand the face cake smashing. Not sure how anyone finds that acceptable. Anyone who does that, leave them. Take your kids and get the fuck out. That is such a huge red flag, and that is a hill I will die on.
Edit: Thank you, Brokencappy, for being a decent person and the same to your family
Seriously though. At my brothers 4th birthday, I was barely one. My parents sat me down next to him for the photos, and were so busy that they didn’t realize I had reached out and grabbed the sparkler candles. My 4yo bro was the one to take it out of my hand. (Jury is still out on whether it was because I stole his candle or I was hurt.) The burn scars didn’t fade until middle school.
But my parents did learn there lesson AFTER that.
Including keeping toddlers away from fire and others candles.
Thank you. I imagine such a situation where a few more kids are around. Maybe cousins. I feel that when I would point out to take the other kids away from the candles I would be hardly judged as overprotective or “look at that guy”.
Probaply no one would take any shit if that would happen. Situations like in the video are real and I cannot hide my anger against the surrounding adults.
How many videos are on the internet and not one person in that room prevented a completely avoidable situation.
Adults need to take accountability for their action and inaction. It is neither child's fault. It's the parents not being observant.
I couldn't agree more. You can tell by the "oh god" at the end. They sound so irritated over them having a reasonable kid reaction to something hurting their feeling
She probably started crying when she noticed who the favorite kid was.
Seems like she didn’t cry because of what her sister did, but because of how her parents just let her do it with no regards of the birthday girls feelings
The worst parts about this to me are: 1) the group of adults laughing at the smaller kid when they blow out the candles and 2) that you can hear an adult reprimand the OLDER GIRL when she starts to validly express being upset.
I get the feeling that in her house she’s scolded a lot for not being “nicer” to her sibling when she’s just reacting appropriately to a situation.
> I get the feeling that in her house, she's scolded a lot for not being nicer to her sibling when she's just reacting appropriately to a situation
I had to set my husband straight on this once. He made a comment about how his older sister was always so mean to him growing up. I had to remind him that his sister was first put in charge of babysitting him when she was 4, and he was 2. Not to mention that once their younger sibling came along and their parents divorced, big sister was basically a de facto parent to two kids while in the third grade. It's not that she was mean. It's that she was rightfully overwhelmed and furious about the situation the adults in her life put her in.
WHY are these videos always featuring parents SOMEHOW BEWILDERED that their child is mad about their magical event being ruined??? "Oh haha it baby, baby no make decision, so we no make decision for baby...but what this older child has emotion??? BAD decision!"
The girl handled this exceptionally well but c’mon. Of course she is going to cry, it’s her birthday, & it’s her cake. Why would the parents even put the younger sibling there knowing how youngsters can be.
Look at that tiny psycho. She was mad the whole song and had the worst bitch face I've seen in a kid for a while, then had a face of content after blowing the candle and being attacked.
Was coming to share this video. Allowing this behaviour will produce children with self-centred behaviour and low emotional regulation who won’t know how to handle being told “no”
A lot of parents don't take in account of the child's emotions, it's a shame that they do that, and now that little girl is going to be upset at her sibling for how ever long she wants to all for the sake of a laugh from the parents
That’s the worst feeling. Trying to swallow tears you know are silly but still hurt deeply for some reason. That pit in the back of your throat gets extremely big trying to fight it.
See this stuff happen all the time. It’s Birthday Girl’s day and some lazy parent won’t teach their self-important kid the manners necessary at functions like this.
bro stop the kid, relight the candle, say "you get two wishes now." and put the baby in a high chair on the roof or whatever.
im not a parent but this damage control seems obvious,
It is that kids birthday and I see no one else in the view. Why does there have to be anyone next to the birthday person? It is their day. Let them have their cake and blow out the candles on their own. Sheesh.
Why didn’t anybody stop her they just sitting there allowing it she’s gonna be spoiled rotten by the time she’s 5 if this is how they treat after she does something wrong
Why does this make me irrationally mad, lol. The girl clearly tries to tell herself that it's fine. It's not fine. Then the little sister gets picked as slowly as possible, AFTER she wasted the candles. I feel like I developed anger issues just from watching this
Why do parents let this happen/encourage this? My younger sister would do this and no one would bat an eye, I put a stop to it whenever I saw that happening.
It’s ridiculous
This is why I avoid any event involving parents and children. The kids are usually fine, because they're kids and just being themselves, but you always invariably get the crappy parents who find a way of spoiling the event or creating melodrama.
Poor girl. Getting to blow your own candles out on your birthday cake is kind of the whole point of the birthday party. This is one of the few moments in life when it really is all about you. That younger kid should have been nowhere near that cake when the candles were lit.
And like, what was the point of messing with her hair? Poor girl needed a hug at least.
This happened to me once. Neighbor kid blew out my candles and she was way too old to have just been confused. Her mom immediately picked her up and moved her then made a whole show about relighting the candles for me because it was my birthday and no one else gets to blow out candles. That’s good parenting not just continuing to sing and letting this shit go down.
When I turned 18 my folks got me a cake. My aunt and uncle had always been making excuses for my little cousin saying, "He's just a kid" when I would try to stop him from doing shit he shouldn't. Well he had a reputation for putting his hands in his cake every birthday, and I told them "don't let him do it here. Well, he got his hands on the cake. When I protested it was the same old, "he's just a kid" but I wasn't cool about it. So my aunt just up and left.
She had the same mental problems I do so I don't think badly of her, she just probably felt embarrassed and couldn't deal. Been there.
As a mom of three and if I thought another sibling would do something like this I would have them no where near while she blows out her candles. This is supposed to be their special day. The little things can be so important, especially to a child.
Sometimes it’s clear to me when people have spent time with children and when they haven’t. This is a clear example of when they haven’t, and how they should aim to learn more about child development, including how toddlers are impulsive and unpredictable and older kids have real, big feelings that can shape experiences they take with them through life.
The toddler 1) absolutely isn’t in the wrong or right for blowing out the candles and doesn’t understand social norms like you don’t blow out someone else’s candles 2) should’ve been held away from the cake and 3) should’ve been removed instantly when it began
The older girl 1) should’ve been offered a chance to re-blow the candles entirely 2) reassures it’s normal and okay to be mad at the toddler and 3) should’ve received an apology from the grown ups who didn’t anticipate this happening (but should’ve)
Also just as an aside I’m still amazed that we went back to blowing on whole ass cakes after the pandemic, like damn, cut a slice and stick a candle in it, then blow that one out and eat your own slice spit-free. I thought we were gonna stick with this but guess not!
To everyone criticizing the parents:
They probably weren't the ones laughing or even to post the video. It appears that Mom lifted the little girl out within what was 10-15 seconds, not a bad reaction time. Someone else was saying "let's do it again!" Sibling relationships are incredible for growth as a young person and helicoptering everything as a parent limits the potential for development of an independent healthy relationship.
Advice to fellow parents:
This is certainly a teachable moment. However, I have found, particularly with the apparent ages in question that a little space is good and then follow up later when the setting, time, and emotions have changed. Bringing things full circle in a new environ tends to help the "lesson" stick better.
Light them. Again.
Adults reacting ( over reacting) rarely helps. Why a kid melts down in these moments is not always willful or kid Karen. Overwhelming input from a big group.
Anyways. I would have laughed. Started whispering into birthday girls ear.
“Relax we’re going to light them for just you. Littles get exited. Breath and smile and you’ll loook like a hero.
Piss poor parenting right here.
And then to post it. Take this shit down
What about all that sweet, sweet internet points.
r/donthelpjustfilm
don the lp just film
I second this. Take it down. Heart breaking. Mine would have been just as upset, hard as they tried not to be.
Exactly. They’re kids. They act like kids. No need to put it online for scrutiny. Feel very sorry for the birthday child because their reaction is completely normal for their age.
Very bad. To sit and allow thr younger kid to continue.
Exactly. Having children spit all over cakes and then expecting everyone to just go ahead and eat it is disgusting.
And, people think I'm crazy for wanting to attend birthday parties but saying no to birthday cake.
I remember being at my cousin's kid's birthday party and you could see the spit strings flying out of his mouth all over the cake. I looked up in horror and disgust at my other cousin and she gave me this "Don't you say a fucking word" look. I didn't say anything, but I'm also not touching that fucking cake.
I’ve a very weak stomach with things like this. I’d have had to leave the room to go gag. Honestly I’m an embarrassment lol
You are a treasure not an embarrassment.
Haha thanks 😊
This is why when I make birthday cakes for my friends and put candles on them (because you can tear forcing people to blow out a candle out of my cold, dead hands), I actually make a batch of cupcakes and stick a candle in one cupcake. Ain't no one gonna be eating a spit cake out of my kitchen!
I’d rather spit from a stranger than my niece and nephews. I love them, but those things are walking petri dishes.
This is why my mother made or bought cupcakes. Birthday child gets one with a candle and everyone else gets a spit free cupcake.
I thought after Covid we were done with this horrible tradition. Last bday party we had the person pull a single candle and blow it out away from the cake.
Ive been to a couple where the person "blow" out the candles by swiping their arms back and forth like wings
I've always wanted to get a electric leaf blower to blow out my birthday candles. My mother never did let me try
Its fine covid is done now, it only kills like... 2000 Americans a week
We now give the birthday kid a folding fan to blow out the candles. My nieces love it.
This is my life now. My sister has two toddlers. they blow out everyone’s candles, spit all over the cake, and yet still have tantrums that everything isn’t about them. Lord help me
Your sister is a bad parent. My mom has 6 kids and I’m the oldest at 20 youngest is 3. We’ve never had that issue. It’s so rude. Little kids only think everything is about them when they’re made to believe that. It ain’t right.
Your sister sucks. I would never invite someone who let their children do whatever they wanted to.
They blow out other people's candles???
You have a typo. It should be ‘My sister and I let her two toddlers blow out everyone’s candles’. You’re the adults.. teach the Kids how to act right. If they cry let them. You’re enabling poor behavior
Now we know how covid is really spread. Kids Birthday parties.
We like to do cupcake "cakes" which is PERFECT because you can 1. Pull the birthday person's desired cupcake and light up **just** that cupcake and 2. You can easily distribute cupcakes to all of the party goers with minimal mess and fuss. People could still also just cut the birthday person a slice and pop the candle on there and save everyone else the act of partaking in cake and germs.
Why can't some parents just let the birthday kid have their moment? They always gotta jam another one in there to steal some of the attention.
My sister always had to buy the little guy a little present when it was his sisters birthday. What do you think she got when it was his birthday? Squat. Because she don’t whine.
Because it's not a good TikTok video of the birthday kid is smiling and happy.
Defintely. And not relighting the candles? Wtf
In my experience the child would get angrier and detroy the cake. Once the emotion damn has broken they are inconsolable. Heck the same shit happens to teenagers who know better and the emotion damn still clouds every facet of their brain from critical thinking. When i was 8 or 9 i got 2 beyblades, 1 for me and 1 as a present for my best friends birthday party. Well my mom wrapped the wrong one and when he opened it i started crying and freaking out saying it was mine. In the back of my head i knew it didn't matter and i still had the other one at home...but no i ruined that party. I screamed and cried until they finally gave it to me and then i locked myself in the bathroom and played with it. Then i couldn't bring myself to leave the bathroom in shame so i yelled that i needed my mom. Edit. It was a planned sleepover and she had to drive over. She had to get me out of the bathroom, and clayton never talked to me again. I cringe everytime i think about it and wish i could time travel. Icing on the cake, i ran into him at college orientation(so what 11 years later) and as he was leaving he said "oops i wouldn't want to accidentally take your pen" and dropped it on the table and left....gutted
Damn you were like 8 I feel he should've let it go by now and realised you're probably not like that anymore lmao
I was probably still like that until 11 or 12 haha. Tbh it was probably learned distain, as i went to a private christian school my parents could barely afford and they were 10 years younger than the rest of the parents of my friends. I had to leave in 6th grade because my parents couldn't afford it and i never got to hang out with any of my freinds again until highschool when a couple left and their parents talked to my parents about how everyone was stuck up and they destained my family for not belonging. So you take that scenario, and his parents talking about the trailer trash that left, i can see him not being excited to see me like i was to see him.
Nah bruh fuck Clayton, he should've let it go by now. If you feel bad about your behavior, that shows emotional maturity. But hey, you were 8. We all have bad days. It's all good 👍 But if a dude in his early 20's wants to act all petty about something that happened at his 8th birthday party he needs to grow tf up lol
Clayton sounds like a dick. Your 8 year old self was probably ramped up from being around a little grudge holding turd.
I responded to someone else, but his parents were with the crowd that ignored and cut contact with my parents after we couldnt afford to keep going to the private school. So it was probably learned distain on top of an easy jab from the past. The kids who left for public school came back into my life and the parents lemented on how shitty the clique environment was.
I swear to God a parent will make the tiniest miscalculation and then some random group of Redditors claw their way back out of Hell itself just so they can take all that vitriol and throw it at some people that literally just mildly inconvenienced their child.
Putting the little sister down next to the cake is a miscalculation, sure. The delay in doing something is a little shitty, but the damage was already done. But they deserve to be shit on for posting this online. It does nothing but show a difficult moment for someone who very likely did not consent to it being posted. People need to calm down on displaying every moment of their kids lives (especially the hard ones) online. My cousin does this and I'm so embarrassed for her kids.
I don’t think anybody needs to call CPS or anything, but this is also not a great thing to allow to happen. Parents tend to laugh this sort of thing off as a younger child annoying their older sibling in an ultimately harmless way. But the older girl here is probably picking up on how the adults let her sister take something she was looking forward to, and remembering how much trouble she’s gotten in whenever she did the same thing to her sister. My younger brother and I had the same dynamic, and the message I internalized as a young kid was that other people were allowed to have nice things, but my rules were that I had to sit there politely while other people took my nice things from me. That’s why the girl yells at the end - she’s not pissed that she didn’t get to blow out candles, she’s pissed because something was taken from her unfairly and the people who were supposed to fix unfair situations wouldn’t take it seriously.
Maybe don’t use your child crying for internet clout if you aren’t willing to have your parenting criticized.
nah bro, look at all that stuff. my parent (only had mother) never gave a shit about my birthday, just a horrible day as any other day in my childhood. thats poor parenting.
Where's the guy with the paper plate when we need him the most.
Or maybe a mistake from a very tired parent.
Why do so many adults/parents allow this? It's certainly not cute to the birthday girl...
Yeah. Assuming this is her sister, I’m sure it feels like her whole life is centered around the younger sister. She can’t have one day where things get to be about her?
And then the parents act really surprised when they can't get along at all in their teens. Then when she confronts them as to why they'll go "WE GAVE YOU EVERYTHING", get mad and punish her some more. It's sad but really prevalent.
Can you get out of my head, please? Fuck. I'm grown up now, and I love my parents, but I've heard "you had a great childhood, we put a roof over your head and fed you" so many god damn times. I appreciate that you did the bare minimum to keep me alive, mom. But you never listened to my wants or needs ever growing up, and now you can't figure out why I don't call or visit more often.
Because they are self absorbed twats. They think of their reaction and emotions, not those of the child.
Yeah a lot of parents of younger children see their parties as an excuse to all get together and drink and hang out in an acceptable environment.
Very true. The last bday party I worked the parents had an open bar
Because the parents’ world revolves around their child and a lot of them forget that others don’t feel this way.
Child does dumb child thing = parents are horrible people who are intentionally tormenting their child with mind games
Average redditor mentality, there are no gray areas, you're either an asshole or an asshole.
Guess I’m an asshole then.
They think it be cute for pictures and for memories. But it's not cute, and the only one walking away with memories of this day will be the birthday girl.
Adults have no idea how special birthdays are to such young children. I could imagine myself in her situation at that age and I'd be absolutely miserable.
My parents ignored my 13 birthday and didn't get me a cake, and I was very upset I didn't get my birthday wish for my first teen year. We went to a restaurant with a 3 hour wait time instead because that's where my grandparents wanted to go. When I came home and started crying I didn't get my happy birthday wish, they got really pissy with me. Flash forward a few years, and I forgot Mother's Day because it was right smack in the middle of college finals. My mom threw a fit about it and continued to bring it up for 2 years. I finally said "if you stop bringing it up all the time, I'll stop telling people how the whole family ignored my 13 birthday because you wanted to go to Outback Steakhouse." She stared at me for a moment and then agreed. Birthdays are really important to kids and especially girls. It's not about you.
3 hour wait time... for Outback? That's adding salt to the wound.
Lack of understanding of what empathy really is. I swear to you, they don't teach this at all.
yeah, way to ruin special day for little one. you are fairly special but not as special as the even littler one.
Too busy filming
To be fair, at my oldest last birthday I asked if her younger sister could help blow out the candles. She loves to include her sister so excitedly said yes. I won’t assume every year is a yes but she was happy to share.
That's completely fine, in my opinion. You asked and got their buy in. It's when the adults in the crowd don't try to prevent the kid's special day from being hijacked that it makes me sad for the kid.
The same reason they then took the video of it happening and uploaded it to the Internet. Their experience of the event is more important than that of the children... and the little kid stealing the show is a more interesting outcome for the parent.. if everything went smoothly what sort of story would the parent have to tell, after all? When you live your life thinking you're the protagonist, sometimes you stop caring about the npcs.
For a kid that believes that wishes come from blowing out candles, stealing a wish is kind of a big deal.
Which preemptively answers my question of why can't they just relight the candles.
They can. But it’s not the same, come on. A re-do after the little sister (or whoever) stole her moment will not be the same in her head.
To a kid, the magic of the moment is gone and relighting the candle won’t help
I think they planned to but the birthday girl started crying (rightfully so) before they got a chance to.
Only cuz she told em. You can see her going, "AGAIN" and they seem confused, which just blows my mind.
You can also hear the woman who picks up the younger kid saying "we'll do it again" to her before she screams again
That's not how birthday wish magic works, look at this guy thinking you can just make more wishes... pffft, next you'll be saying you wished for more wishes...
Yep and everyone knows wishes become twice as powerful when the candles are relit.
Well the mom was saying “we’ll do it again”
It is her birthday, and she CAN cry if she wants too
You’d cry too if it happened to you…
Something like this happened to me and I did, in fact, cry.
She'll cry until the candles burn down the place--oh wait they were blown out 😬
I like how the mom or lady grabs her as slow as possible after she’s blown out all but one candle . Could you put in any less effort?
**Put in ANY effort…..fixed it for ya lol
[удалено]
Tbf, mom did tell Georgia “we’ll do it again” when she grabbed little sis. And bless Georgia, she tried so hard to be a good sport, but sadness overcame her.
She handled it pretty well for her age. That "oh god" at the end was pretty funny
Yeah, he knows this is where it goes downhill for the rest of the time
To be fair, a lot of this is his own fault.
Had to be dad at the end there
I thought that. I was like er this is your doing.. I had to share my birthday with my younger sister. Same day 3 years apart. But I would have been exactly like the birthday girl if someone else had blown out the candles. It's like the parents knew that it would happen and hope that she would be OK with it. Like let the girl have one day to celebrate her. I bet she has to share everything with her sibling. I feel for the birthday girl. That's her cake and her moment. Plus she is 7. How are we meant to think she should have adult emotions at this moment?
Do people not realize that the emotions kids feel are real and justified? They're dealing with life for the first time. Shit like this sticks to your memories. Let her have her day as i'm sure the other little monster gets to personally destroy it's own cake on it's day. Parents suck.
Seriously. My youngest sibling (7 years between us) was born prematurely on my birthday by totally random chance. My parents understood that sharing the day could present problems, especially since my sibling was so much younger, and they always went out of their way to ensure we both celebrated our days in ways that gave us both full attention and total individuality. One year, my aunt was in charge of the cake situation, and she bought just one birthday cake (that had a really babyish design geared more for my sibling) for both of us to share. My mom freaked out since she specified there had to be two and didn’t want me to have to just shut up and accept having a “baby” cake, and she went out to get another cake for me so we’d both have our own. I still remember that stuff, and while it was maybe silly or a waste or a small thing or something, it always showed me that my parents respected me and gave me absolute equal attention to my siblings and didn’t let the baby of the family take over a day that was already mine just for simplicity’s sake. Now that we’re adults we just share, but it mattered a lot as a kid.
Your mom rocks. I dated a dude in high school whose birthday was a day after Christmas. They always worked hard to make sure he still got a special day instead of it just being lumped in with holiday festivities, and I always thought that was really special.
It absolutely matters to children! They want to feel special! Your mom sounds awesome.
very similar situation here, me and my brother are twins and when we were younger(9) we lived in a homeless shelter. he’s a big fan of chocolate but i’ve never liked it and the staff knew so on our birthday they suprised us with a spider-man cake that was half vanilla and half chocolate. the part that stuck with me the most was not them surprising us with cake but they cared enough to include both our opinions
I wish I had your parents, my mom and step father never really gave a fuck about me, they got married on my birthday and now always celebrate their failing marriage before even beginning to give the first of fucks about my birthday or that I even existed, I’m just glad that my biological sister gets better treatment yet I wish she didn’t have to suffer from their selfishness and ignorance
what a great mum. making sure both of your birthdays were important and separate until y'all were old enough to decide to share. what's the difference between buying two cakes on two different days out of the year, vs buying two cakes for one day? must have felt really good to have your mum understand you unconditionally like that.
I was born on my sisters’ sixth birthday. They are twins. There were always three of us sharing the day. Until I was about 9, Mom made sure, even when we were at our poorest, each of us had a cake to ourselves. We may have shared the actual party, but we all had our own cake for us and our friends. (The twins couldn’t be more unalike and had different friends.)
No. Sadly many do not
What kind of parent doesn't know their kid like this? My son will absolutely blow anybody's candles away. He's autistic. He is standing by the entire time
My oldest 2 are autistic. We have always had birthday kid out their own candles, and then we relight for siblings or birthday kid again. One is obsessed and constantly blows out my scented candles.
So everyone gets a take to spray salvia over the cake. Yummy…
Nobody is forcing you to eat the cake bud.
That's how our family did it for a while, everybody gets a turn. Until there were like 12 cousins/siblings. Then it was just birthday kid again.
LOL Reminds me when I wasn't aware of my autistic nephew's love for blowing candles, and he is faster than the speed of light. Imagine my surprise when he suddenly took off across the room to blow out all the prayer candles at church while yelling out, "CAAAAANDLEEEE!!!!" before I could get to him 😬 and he is mainly nonverbal, but he really said candle loud and clear. I felt really guilty about what happened but also happy to have heard him talk 😅
Ngl I would have laughed until I cried. Loving his passion 🕯️
I’m sorry, when you said “standing by the entire time” I just had a vision of your son with an earpiece, sunglasses, and a suit, waiting for intel that the candles were about to be lit and his time to blow them out has come 😂
Sometimes I'm surprised how adults don't realize that all kids have three traits in common they are dumb, impulsive and selfish if you put them next to anything they want they will take it they don't care cause they don't have the self control of an adult.
So... just smaller versions of adults then?
I mean basically adults are just better at hiding the last two
You know why it’s a big deal when kids do nice things? Because it’s an unnatural behaviour. Kids first instinct is to be selfish, so it takes a lot of time to teach them to be selfless and giving. You gotta assume the worst all the time, because if you don’t you won’t be prepared for if it happens. I haven’t even met this kid, and I could tell just by his face how this was gonna end. No way the parents couldn’t.
So many people's piss poor excuses to relieve themselves when things don't go the right way, and it could have been prevented. I'd say the best remedy for this is to go up to your kid and connect with them and say, "I'm sorry, your sister blew your candles out, and that hurt your feelings." Then offer a couple solutions. "Do you want to do it again" "do you want to help cut the cake and get the first piece" I bet the tears are gone, and they feel connected to you. And don't leave the younger one out of a learning opportunity. Teach them that we don't bow out other people's candles. It's not a nice thing to do. Many family's would just gaslight that child and tell them to quit crying. Really think about it though, how would you feel if that special moment was taken from you? You would be a little hurt. As an adult, you can probably control your emotions better, but kids can't, so they lose it over things like this. Be better parents, and have a faster reaction time. They all just watched that shit happen and now look where we are.
The best of remedies is prevention. The adults were more concerned with the “picture moment” than remembering that the baby will obviously blow out any candle in front of them. I don’t know that baby and could see this happening a mile away.
Exactly. I say a comment that said "I bet the parents thought it would be cute to have them next to each other." Okay and..... who cares. Parents be ruining all type of things for their kids all because they (the parents) think it's a good idea. Edit: I found the comment "Kinda harsh... Parents prolly thought it could have been wholesome moment for two siblings to share and to have memories of. You acting like the parents beat the kid on her birthday 💀" @doedoe21doe
In my circle, we sit the birthday person down and do the song and candles while the horde of toddlers and candle-blowers are held back and told to allow the person their special day and a solo picture. *Then* we release the horde and take pictures. (Toddlers birthdays get a small cake/cupcake to blow on because who wants toddler spit on their cake? The blowing of 1 person is quite enough, thanks). Everybody gets a piece of the action and the pictures they want, nobody’s feelings get hurt. You can imagine how my posse feels about face-cake smashers…
🤬 I can not stand the face cake smashing. Not sure how anyone finds that acceptable. Anyone who does that, leave them. Take your kids and get the fuck out. That is such a huge red flag, and that is a hill I will die on. Edit: Thank you, Brokencappy, for being a decent person and the same to your family
Seriously though. At my brothers 4th birthday, I was barely one. My parents sat me down next to him for the photos, and were so busy that they didn’t realize I had reached out and grabbed the sparkler candles. My 4yo bro was the one to take it out of my hand. (Jury is still out on whether it was because I stole his candle or I was hurt.) The burn scars didn’t fade until middle school. But my parents did learn there lesson AFTER that. Including keeping toddlers away from fire and others candles.
Thank you. I imagine such a situation where a few more kids are around. Maybe cousins. I feel that when I would point out to take the other kids away from the candles I would be hardly judged as overprotective or “look at that guy”. Probaply no one would take any shit if that would happen. Situations like in the video are real and I cannot hide my anger against the surrounding adults.
How many videos are on the internet and not one person in that room prevented a completely avoidable situation. Adults need to take accountability for their action and inaction. It is neither child's fault. It's the parents not being observant.
I agree 100% That is clearly a narcissistic family culture in that video. Passing generational trauma down to the next generation
I couldn't agree more. You can tell by the "oh god" at the end. They sound so irritated over them having a reasonable kid reaction to something hurting their feeling
It's their own shame they immediately had to affix to a little kid. Sad to see really.
I love how no one punishes the baby, but the birthday girl gets in trouble. I hate this kind of treatment for youngest child.
She probably started crying when she noticed who the favorite kid was. Seems like she didn’t cry because of what her sister did, but because of how her parents just let her do it with no regards of the birthday girls feelings
You’re totally right.
The worst parts about this to me are: 1) the group of adults laughing at the smaller kid when they blow out the candles and 2) that you can hear an adult reprimand the OLDER GIRL when she starts to validly express being upset. I get the feeling that in her house she’s scolded a lot for not being “nicer” to her sibling when she’s just reacting appropriately to a situation.
> I get the feeling that in her house, she's scolded a lot for not being nicer to her sibling when she's just reacting appropriately to a situation I had to set my husband straight on this once. He made a comment about how his older sister was always so mean to him growing up. I had to remind him that his sister was first put in charge of babysitting him when she was 4, and he was 2. Not to mention that once their younger sibling came along and their parents divorced, big sister was basically a de facto parent to two kids while in the third grade. It's not that she was mean. It's that she was rightfully overwhelmed and furious about the situation the adults in her life put her in.
Your husband is lucky to have someone like you to help him see the whole picture.
My parents raised us like that. Guess what happened to my little sister when she grew up?
Obviously you would quickly re-light them and hype her up again. “Blow the last one!” - shitty parents.
Re-lighting the candles is not the same, especially at the age when you most likely still believe in the magic of birthday wishes.
If you slow it down, you can pinpoint the exact frame she starts to develop trust issues.
Someone shouldve used the old paper plate trick
the tantrum that kid pulls in that video upon his defeat cracks me up.
It satisfies me to no end
WHY are these videos always featuring parents SOMEHOW BEWILDERED that their child is mad about their magical event being ruined??? "Oh haha it baby, baby no make decision, so we no make decision for baby...but what this older child has emotion??? BAD decision!"
It’s supposed to be cute! Stop ruining your birthday for us! As I see a room full of adults.
To the dad that said “oh god” while his daughter cries at that moment… piss off.
Probably having waited most of the year looking forward to blow out the candles, certainly ruined that moment poor thing lol
Damn where the parents lol someone would’ve got there ears stomped together if this were to happen at one of my family events
I hate that little "Oh Gawd" comment at the end
The girl handled this exceptionally well but c’mon. Of course she is going to cry, it’s her birthday, & it’s her cake. Why would the parents even put the younger sibling there knowing how youngsters can be.
What should’ve happened… https://www.tiktok.com/@sandy.ro5/video/7117645202671635755?lang=en
That child was so smug. Definitely a mean girl in the making.
Look at that tiny psycho. She was mad the whole song and had the worst bitch face I've seen in a kid for a while, then had a face of content after blowing the candle and being attacked.
Was coming to share this video. Allowing this behaviour will produce children with self-centred behaviour and low emotional regulation who won’t know how to handle being told “no”
This is kinda sad.
A lot of parents don't take in account of the child's emotions, it's a shame that they do that, and now that little girl is going to be upset at her sibling for how ever long she wants to all for the sake of a laugh from the parents
It's called emotional neglect and can screw someone up for life.
This is infuriating to watch. What absolute dogshit parents.
That’s the worst feeling. Trying to swallow tears you know are silly but still hurt deeply for some reason. That pit in the back of your throat gets extremely big trying to fight it.
Parents are REALLY fucking stupid sometimes, JFC
See this stuff happen all the time. It’s Birthday Girl’s day and some lazy parent won’t teach their self-important kid the manners necessary at functions like this.
bro stop the kid, relight the candle, say "you get two wishes now." and put the baby in a high chair on the roof or whatever. im not a parent but this damage control seems obvious,
Being the oldest sucks.
*Putting your younger kid next to the cake hoping they blow out the candles and you get a viral video* shameful!
Get your shitty baby..
This whole situation is out of control. Piss poor parenting for sure
The idiot parents just ruined her special day
All those adults standing around watching?!?!! Atrocious!
Caption should instead be “I sat around while doing nothing until my child couldn’t handle it anymore” lmao fuckin cringeee
Where’s the uncle with the paper plate?
Where that dude with the plate when you need him!?
dude someone hug her. poor child. 😢
That baby doesn’t know any better, but those adults should have
I feel bad for the kid. I’d cry and I’m an adult. It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to.
Another example to why most people shouldn’t have kids.
It is that kids birthday and I see no one else in the view. Why does there have to be anyone next to the birthday person? It is their day. Let them have their cake and blow out the candles on their own. Sheesh.
I did this to my older sister when I was little and she still uses it against me, but it's deserved.
Just had my vasectomy’s three year birthday party. We had weed, beer, pizza, and cake.
Another set of parents who focus everything even the older childs event on the younger child feelings
It is called bad parrenting.
Everyone knew that would happen because it always happens. Those parents are assholes.
Why didn’t anybody stop her they just sitting there allowing it she’s gonna be spoiled rotten by the time she’s 5 if this is how they treat after she does something wrong
Why does this make me irrationally mad, lol. The girl clearly tries to tell herself that it's fine. It's not fine. Then the little sister gets picked as slowly as possible, AFTER she wasted the candles. I feel like I developed anger issues just from watching this
They really not gonna relight the fucking candles for birthday girl?
And then wonder why the 7yo is pissed...
Seems like it would be common knowledge by now not to let a sibling sit beside the birthday kid when there are candles to be blown out.
[And this is what better parenting looks like](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UDwIh3nDj0Y&ab_channel=RandomLegend)
Villain Origin Story
I’d send all the kids to their parents so their parents can hold them back from being AH
Why do people do this? Be adults and let the birthday girl have her time.
Rotten parents
This is kinda sad to watch, just terrible parenting
Why do parents let this happen/encourage this? My younger sister would do this and no one would bat an eye, I put a stop to it whenever I saw that happening. It’s ridiculous
That's not fair. She kept her cool until the end.
This is why I avoid any event involving parents and children. The kids are usually fine, because they're kids and just being themselves, but you always invariably get the crappy parents who find a way of spoiling the event or creating melodrama. Poor girl. Getting to blow your own candles out on your birthday cake is kind of the whole point of the birthday party. This is one of the few moments in life when it really is all about you. That younger kid should have been nowhere near that cake when the candles were lit. And like, what was the point of messing with her hair? Poor girl needed a hug at least.
This happened to me once. Neighbor kid blew out my candles and she was way too old to have just been confused. Her mom immediately picked her up and moved her then made a whole show about relighting the candles for me because it was my birthday and no one else gets to blow out candles. That’s good parenting not just continuing to sing and letting this shit go down.
Should have brought a paper plate.
Why didn’t anyone step in when she first started blowing them out? Literally so stupid
When I turned 18 my folks got me a cake. My aunt and uncle had always been making excuses for my little cousin saying, "He's just a kid" when I would try to stop him from doing shit he shouldn't. Well he had a reputation for putting his hands in his cake every birthday, and I told them "don't let him do it here. Well, he got his hands on the cake. When I protested it was the same old, "he's just a kid" but I wasn't cool about it. So my aunt just up and left. She had the same mental problems I do so I don't think badly of her, she just probably felt embarrassed and couldn't deal. Been there.
Bad parenting in general and blowing candles over the cake is kind of disgusting now.
As a mom of three and if I thought another sibling would do something like this I would have them no where near while she blows out her candles. This is supposed to be their special day. The little things can be so important, especially to a child.
I wanna see that other kid that was blocked and cried.
Sometimes it’s clear to me when people have spent time with children and when they haven’t. This is a clear example of when they haven’t, and how they should aim to learn more about child development, including how toddlers are impulsive and unpredictable and older kids have real, big feelings that can shape experiences they take with them through life. The toddler 1) absolutely isn’t in the wrong or right for blowing out the candles and doesn’t understand social norms like you don’t blow out someone else’s candles 2) should’ve been held away from the cake and 3) should’ve been removed instantly when it began The older girl 1) should’ve been offered a chance to re-blow the candles entirely 2) reassures it’s normal and okay to be mad at the toddler and 3) should’ve received an apology from the grown ups who didn’t anticipate this happening (but should’ve) Also just as an aside I’m still amazed that we went back to blowing on whole ass cakes after the pandemic, like damn, cut a slice and stick a candle in it, then blow that one out and eat your own slice spit-free. I thought we were gonna stick with this but guess not!
To everyone criticizing the parents: They probably weren't the ones laughing or even to post the video. It appears that Mom lifted the little girl out within what was 10-15 seconds, not a bad reaction time. Someone else was saying "let's do it again!" Sibling relationships are incredible for growth as a young person and helicoptering everything as a parent limits the potential for development of an independent healthy relationship. Advice to fellow parents: This is certainly a teachable moment. However, I have found, particularly with the apparent ages in question that a little space is good and then follow up later when the setting, time, and emotions have changed. Bringing things full circle in a new environ tends to help the "lesson" stick better.
She is waaaaay too old to be crying like that at the end tho. That’s 2yo stuff
Light them. Again. Adults reacting ( over reacting) rarely helps. Why a kid melts down in these moments is not always willful or kid Karen. Overwhelming input from a big group. Anyways. I would have laughed. Started whispering into birthday girls ear. “Relax we’re going to light them for just you. Littles get exited. Breath and smile and you’ll loook like a hero.
This happened to to my son by her younger sister, we just moved the daughter and relit the candles, everything was fine